Today we heard a sermon on Matthew 13:33, which talked about preparing leavened bread. While she spoke, she talked about yeast, and sourdough starter, and how it all intertwined with today’s pandemic. The speaker kept mentioning something about leading simple lives, and finding God’s kingdom in it.
Then it hit me.
I prayed for this time of simplicity, and it is something I have prayed for repeatedly, for many, many, years.
I can remember standing in the shower on some mornings before work, praying for things like being able to be a stay at home mom (to my now-grown children), being able to bake bread, make much more healthy (or unhealthy as it were) and interesting meals, keeping house, and finding joy in the simplicity of it all, and not having to deal with the hustle and bustle of the rushed world, slowing down to really enjoy the prayers God answered for me.
Four weeks into an epidemic, and I’m finally starting to understand just how much of an impact my prayers have had on my life, not to mention the prayers that were prayed for my family!
This is what has finally brought me a sense of peace. It’s a remarkable feeling of relief and a real lightbulb moment that the Lord really DOES answer prayers. Granted, it may not be the most opportune type of answer, but the rest of the world is also forced to slow down as well. Yes, I know. It’s not ideal for a lot of people to be out of work, and have to struggle so hard to make ends meet, some people don’t even know where their next meal may come from. But the resources, at least in this state, are huge, and you just have to pay attention to know where to find them, instead of throwing up your hands and giving up.
The biggest resource, is God. I’m finding that if I can just sit in the stillness, meditate, and pray (which again, I know isn’t always ideal for families with young children or a houseful of people, etc). Believe me, I know what it’s like to struggle, I’ve definitely had my fair share. It took a LOT of years to get to this point of relying on God and the power of prayer.
Let me back up. I still struggle with depression and severe anxiety, but it’s not only an emotional thing, it’s a DNA thing. I still get hit with news that is negative and distressing, and I lose my faith in an instant. (at least, I think I do). But I’ve noticed that my first inclination is to send up prayers. I have friends who are like-minded folks of faith, and they always seem to show up right when I need them most; whether in the form of a call, text, or bible study meeting (recently online only, but still…). God put those folks in my path. I consider them angels. I can only say I feel like they are the reinforcements He sent when I am feeling out of sorts. I can only hope that others feel the same about me.
While this moment of chaos is extremely frustrating and difficult for a lot of folks, I’m choosing to take this time to enjoy my removal from the craziness. For once, I’m thankful that my own compromised immunity is working in my favour. I am feeling very blessed that I have an opportunity to work from the safety and comfort of my home, and that technology is still allowing us to connect in some way. I love the creative ways people are reaching out to each other and I am happy that I have the opportunity to be a homemaker too.
I love having the freedom to be in the kitchen more regularly, to work in my garden, to do little home projects I’ve neglected because I lacked the time and energy to be a worker bee AND a homemaker.
I am, in a word: happy.
Until next time, darlings.
~Mama
A Minute with Mama 